Play Isn’t Just for Kids: Using Play-Based Interventions to Navigate Parental Burnout

As a play-based child therapist, I often witness the transformative power of play in helping children process emotions, build resilience, and restore regulation. But what’s often overlooked is how play can also be an incredibly effective tool for adults—especially parents—facing the very real experience of burnout. Parenting is demanding, and when chronic stress piles up, it can push us into survival mode, where our nervous systems respond with fight, flight, or freeze. Recognizing these stress responses and intentionally responding through playful, embodied strategies can bring much-needed calm, connection, and cooperation back to the home.

Understanding the Three Stress Responses

Our bodies respond to stress in three common ways:

● Fight: This is when you feel angry or like you need to stand up and defend yourself.

● Flight: This happens when you feel scared or want to run away from a situation.

● Freeze: This is when you feel stuck or unable to move because you are overwhelmed.

These responses are natural. However, when they become too strong, they can make us feel burnt out or overly stressed. Play therapy helps us gently work through these feelings and teaches our brain how to relax again.

The Fight Response: When Everything Feels Like a Battle

The “fight” response in adults often looks like irritability, snapping at loved ones, or a low tolerance for noise and mess. In this state, the nervous system is charged and ready to confront perceived threats. Rather than suppressing this energy or trying to “calm down” with logic alone, play can help externalize and discharge that intensity in a healthy, connected way.

Try this:

● Box it out: Put on some music and do a “pillow boxing” session with your kids. Use soft objects to throw, punch, or kick around the room while naming the feeling (e.g., “I’m punching out my frustration!”).

● Stomp and roar: Channel your inner dinosaur and encourage your kids to join in. Roar, stomp, and shake out the tension together.

● Create a “mad dance”: Blast an upbeat song and let everyone move their body in the most dramatic, expressive way possible.

These playful outlets allow your body to release pent-up energy, model healthy emotional expression, and reset your nervous system without the emotional fallout of yelling or conflict.

The Flight Response: When You Want to Escape

Flight mode might show up as an overwhelming urge to retreat, numb out on your phone, or avoid responsibilities altogether. While some alone time is vital, it’s possible to use playful strategies to soothe and reengage with presence instead of dissociating or disconnecting.

Try this:

● Imaginative retreats: Build a fort or blanket cocoon with your kids and pretend you're in a quiet forest or cozy mountain cabin. Use this shared pretend space as a sanctuary to slow down and breathe.

● Animal walks: Get on the floor and move like different animals—slither like a snake, crawl like a bear, hop like a frog. These movements help regulate the body while gently reconnecting you to play and your children.

● Silly hide-and-seek: A short, connected game like hiding behind the couch or under a blanket can help fulfill the flight impulse in a fun, safe way.

These practices create a sense of safety and containment without full withdrawal, allowing your nervous system to shift out of overwhelm.

The Freeze Response: When You Feel Stuck and Numb

Freeze often feels like inertia, disconnection, or emotional numbness. It can be hard to move, speak, or even know what you need. In this state, playful interventions should be gentle and sensory-based to slowly bring the body back online.

Try this:

● Sensory play: Sink your hands into kinetic sand, water beads, or a bowl of rice. Invite your kids to join you and describe the textures out loud.

● Mirror play: Sit face-to-face and copy each other’s slow, silly facial expressions or movements. This builds connection and slowly activates engagement.

● Art and doodling: Use crayons or chalk to scribble, color, or draw freely with your child.

There’s no goal—just letting your hand move is enough to signal safety to your nervous system. Burnout is not a personal failure—it's your body doing its best to survive under stress. By inviting play into your own regulation process, you not only support your healing, but you also model for your children what it means to care for oneself with compassion and creativity. Homes thrive when nervous systems are calm and connected, and sometimes the path back to peace begins with something as simple as a silly dance or a shared moment in a pillow fort. So next time stress or burnout looms, try these play therapy techniques. Let your inner child guide you to a calmer, happier self. Embrace the fun, and remember that

a little play can go a long way toward healing.